The Good Old Days

I'm not a big fan of people who go on and on about the good old days. I don't like hearing about how music today is horrible, or how the internet is ruining everything, or how today's kids just don't get it. I don't like living in the past.
That said, I have been interested in politics for at least 35 years. That used to mean reading newspapers and magazines, and watching a few dry and boring TV shows broadcast on off hours of the weekend. You had to work at it a little. You had to find journalists and columnists who knew what they were talking about, on both sides of the aisle and spectrum. You had to spend time in libraries sometimes.
I was fine with that. One of the things I liked most about it was how much I did a lot of that stuff on my own. I had a few friends who were interested too, and that was enough. No one else really cared that much, which wasn't great for democracy, but it was nice for me.
Cable news came along, and at first I was elated, but I soon realized how much time they had to fill and that it was becoming more focused on the entertainment value of news rather than actual news. Then talk radio got big, and I quickly realized that it was all con men and hucksters and hacks.
Unfortunately, I started finding myself in political “discussions” with people who thought they understood politics. They got their information from one source, and not a good one at that. They didn't realize that journalism is supposed to be impartial, and stories and opinions need to be researched. They were just getting false information and propaganda from people putting on a show. Worse yet, they were condescending to me about it, like I was the idiot.
It's no secret I'm a raging liberal. I have a definite bias towards it. I can be, I'm not a journalist. Thing is, I used to have to read daily columns by right wing thinkers who I completely disagreed with, but I respected nonetheless. I would get angered by their viewpoints, but I respected the people espousing them because they were well thought out, and backed up their work. I still considered their arguments and positions, even if I didn't agree.
Then the internet and social media happened, and I don't have to tell you how that's working out. A century or so ago, politics was a raucous and buffoonish sideshow. The louder and incendiary, the better. The more you could work your side up, and pit people against each other, the better. Politics will always be a dog and pony show, but it was much more so back then.
Politics was getting more civilized towards the middle of the 20th century. . Candidates were on TV and radio, and were recorded, so they had to watch what they said. They were on a national stage, literally, and newspapers held them accountable. Still, even back three or four decades ago, the Republicans approached politics like circus barkers. They figured out how to use the media and marketing to rile people up in the same manner as a hundred years ago. They even used the same targets to do it. Immigrants and minorities. Communists, who have now been replaced with terrorists. Crime and godless sinners, corrupting your children.
So people, being people, after all, still bought it. The message hadn't changed, they just needed a way to repackage it for the modern era, slip it past the watchdogs, then use it to rile people up and get them to forget about the real issues. Republicans learned how to control the narrative, by bullying, through fear and intimidation, and mostly by just repeating lies and propaganda until people accepted it as truth.
Republicans also realize that most people do not have the time or interest to delve into all the complexities that make up this country’s problems. They want a target, something or someone to blame, and the Republicans are happy to oblige. It makes their message much more concise, and easy to digest. It’s no matter that message appeals to people’s worse instincts. Hatred, fear, prejudice, misogyny, intolerance, the list goes on. The more you have people controlled by their emotions, the less logic and reason will be applied. Democrats have never been able to figure out a way to deliver their message without a “yeah, but …” That is the problem with being inclusive, or having depth. You can’t always come out with blanket statements, a simple message with a solid target. Groups of people don’t do well with the abstract.
So you end up focusing on goals, which seems fine, but then you have to explain all the steps to reach them, and how it will effect all the people involved, and soon you inevitably end up mentioning sacrifices, and by that time you’ve lost any momentum you’ve had. You’re probably even zoning out as you read that sentence. We have become accustomed to receiving our information in soundbites and memes, in 140 characters or less, and that plays right into the Republicans wheelhouse. What’s easier for people to grasp: a long winded and boring explanation of socioeconomic reasons and global change that lead to the death of manufacturing jobs, or to simply say “immigrants are taking our jobs”, or “unions and regulations are killing business”? The Republicans message skips over all the work and differing factors involved, and does all the thinking for you, and after all, isn’t that what most people want? They see the government as something that is supposed to do all the work for them. They shouldn’t have to micromanage it, yet that’s exactly what a democracy demands. Vigilant, engaged citizens, being a part of the process.
Republicans know that people are lazy. They know that people view government as a necessary evil, not something that they actively want to work at. They know people want to be entertained, not given homework. They realize that they don’t have to even argue the issues, it’s easier and more appealing to our baser natures to just attack character, and find buzzwords and hurl insults. They know that nothing stimulates the mob mentality like the illusion of fighting back, even if there is nothing substantial that you’re actually fighting against. Reacting makes you feel like you are doing something, it makes you feel like you have some control or power, so it makes sense that politicians frame issues in ways that are reactionary.
The sad thing is, people are perfectly capable of delving into issues. TV shows with intricate plotlines and arcs, music and its many forms, sports, with their stats and history and minutiae, lurid real-life murder stories where poring over and analysing every detail is part of the fun. For most people, there is nothing fun or interesting about the very policies that govern them. They know that they should care, but they just can’t force themselves to do it. Critical thinking isn’t sexy to most people, and I don’t think that will ever change.
As a result, we have arrived in the place we are now. A whole nation full of agitated and misled citizens, arguing over things that aren't even real. Distracted by noise, engaging in battles over minor issues, and trafficking in tabloid level journalism. Political discourse has devolved to yelling at each other and repeating misinformation until it becomes reality. Politics has become entertainment, but the very worst form of it, like something you would see on Jerry Springer. These are very dangerous times.
But back to my original point. I miss the days when no one was talking about politics on a daily basis. I miss when family dinners and casual get togethers weren’t dominated by talk of fascism and xenophobia. I miss the times when horrible behavior and statements got you run out of office, rather than made you a hero. I long for the days when people demanded character and class from their leaders, or at least the illusion of it.
I really miss politics being my own little thing, my nerdy sanctuary where I could just be left alone to read and ruminate on what went on in the corridors of power. I’d like you to know that these things I now post on Facebook are really nothing new to me. Even in my teens, I was writing my own stuff, and showing my friends. It kind of became my role in the group. If any of my friends had a question regarding politics or government, they would ask me for my take on it. I used to type these things up, and give copies out to the people I knew, and some of them liked it, just like now. More often than not, people could care less, also just like now. The difference is, I knew which of my friends cared about it as well, and didn’t bother the ones who didn’t.
Now all the stuff I post on here also shows up on people’s timelines who don’t care a thing about it. I kind of feel bad about that, and I also kind of get annoyed that they don’t care about what their government is doing, but what can you do? I get it. Life is hard, and there are a bunch of other things you have to deal with on a daily basis. I’m not going to get too preachy or judgemental about it, and hope you afford me the same luxury. Just scroll on by if it doesn’t interest you, and wait until I post something about a cat or my rabbit.
I also find myself trying to keep it lighter and more generic. In the old days I would have names and figures and examples, but no one wants that now. To be honest, there is so much information coming daily that you can’t ever get ahead of it. You comment on the general hum and tone of whatever is going on because you don’t have time to delve into specifics. That’s a problem too. Most of the in depth reporting comes before or after a story hits the news cycle. You don’t even find out about a lot of it until weeks, months, or even years later.
Where I really wander into the territory of that whole “good old days” mentality that makes me cringe though, is when I see how completely fucked up and broken things are nowadays. The thing that pushed me over the edge this time is that we have arrived at a point where a sitting president is arguing with a porn star on Twitter. A porn star that he paid off to keep quiet about having sex with years ago.
What reality is this? To me, this is way beyond any “rap and computers are killing music” or “kids are addicted to their phones” rhetoric. Again, a sitting president is publicly sparring with a porn star about semantics regarding their sex scandal, which most people apparently aren’t even viewing as a scandal.
How did we arrive here? When did our expectations get this low? The hypocrisy and willful ignorance is astounding. Eight years of conservatives searching for outrage and controversy in everything Barack Obama did, and now all the cognitive dissonance required to ignore the reprehensible actions of Donald Trump. The thing is, none of the outrage from the right, phony or not, changed the minds of anyone on the left, and none of our outrage is going to change most minds on the right. Outrage only really affects your worldview if it outrages you personally. You can put up with a lot of shit if you aren’t impacted too harshly yourself.
The things that are impacting a lot of Trump supporters are again complex and abstract. If you never had great healthcare, why would you get upset about losing it? If you never felt you had a shot at college, or a great job or career with good benefits and workers rights, why would you get outraged by people who are losing theirs? Why would you get all worked up about your medicare and social security in your 20’s and 30’s when it’s so far off in the future that it almost feels alien to you? Why are you concerned with the environment or civil rights when you are struggling everyday to feed your family or just survive?
All these things require abstract thought, and that isn’t a luxury most people possess. Meanwhile, you have one side pumping out misinformation designed to make it worse, and to appeal to the people who just want a quick answer and something to hit. They are further conditioning them to think that this is normal political discourse and activism. Worse yet, people on the left are picking up on that. They are getting their news from suspect sources. They are getting distracted by minor incidents, looking for outrage and finding it everywhere. They are taking their eyes off of the big picture, and getting splintered and losing their effectiveness. Just saying that is going to draw the ire of some on the left who will take it as a personal affront when it is just a general statement about a portion of the whole. That’s where we are, though.
Sure, all the horrible stuff on the right is exhausting, but we are spending all of our energy on short term things that ultimately don’t matter in the grand scheme. That’s by design as well. Divide and conquer, make the enemy fight on too many fronts. We are playing their game, a game that the internet and 24 hour news and social media makes possible.
Like most things we complain about when it comes to the newer generation and modern times, it is really more of the same old shit. Each generation’s music and attitudes and politics looked ridiculous to their parent’s generation; now our kid’s behavior looks ridiculous to us. Perhaps all this garbage right now is necessary. Maybe it’s growing pains. Maybe it all needs to be dragged out into the light to finally kill it. Maybe this is what the middle of a paradigm shift looks like.
This is the age of technology and computers, the internet and information. All the things that your kid’s phones and laptops, the things you hate so much, makes possible. It is a brave new world, and we don’t really understand it, and that frightens us. It is one of the main things that gives the Republicans message so much power. We fear the new, especially when we don’t understand it, and probably never will. The resistance to change is a huge driving force in conservative thinking, and on the left as well, loathe as we are to admit it. Cling to what makes sense to you, no matter how outdated and obsolete it may be.
The thing is, that’s not how visionaries think. Progress doesn’t come from standing still or going backwards. It comes by progressing. Mistakes will be made, failures will occur, that’s how progress works.
So rather than fear it, we should embrace it. For all my hypocritical pining for the old days of political interaction and discourse, the potential for so much more is there with what we have today. Already social media and the internet has had a huge impact on world events and government. Revolutions are being fought everyday, and there is the capability for everyone to be involved and have a voice. It is going to take some time to figure it all out; we are all still infants in this new era, don’t kid yourselves.
But when we do, I believe it will be better than it was, not worse. Unfortunately for now, we are stuck with a traitorous buffoon and a corrupt political party that is frantically doing its best to cling to power and make a cash grab for anything that they can. That is actually a very good sign. It means that they know they are losing, and won’t be around very much longer.
Here’s to the good new days and the future.

Men As Victims

Now the vile right is crying about how men need to be scared, and they are going to be victims. It’s a disgusting and ridiculous ploy to try to frighten people and turn the narrative around. It is a classic technique used over and over again by the very people who have horrible views and perpetrate heinous acts. If you buy into it, you are at best naive, and at worst a horrible human being, possibly with something to hide yourself.
So here’s the thing.
I have known or met hundreds(yes, hundreds) of women who have been the victims of sexual assault and abuse. Chances are very good that you have too, you just don’t know it. I have heard about groping and aggressive behavior, pressuring and threats, not taking no for an answer. I have heard about workplace sexual harassment. I have heard about molestation by family members, friends and neighbors. I have heard about being drugged, being raped, even gang raped. I have heard about being tortured and beaten.
I sit there and I listen to these women tell me about these things, and it is heartbreaking. They are reliving something traumatic and horrific. Some of them break down crying, some of them try to pretend it didn’t really matter, some of them blame themselves.
The thing I notice about all of them is that they are watching my face as they tell me, looking for any sign that I am going to brush it off or not believe them or mock them. They are afraid I will lose respect for them, or judge them, or think it was their fault. When they see that I don’t judge, that I don’t question them, that I believe them, the relief on their faces is immense. Their whole demeanor changes, and their guard comes down. I believe them. I empathize. I cry with them sometimes.
They will often tell me about how other people, men they were seeing, their friends, their parents, the police, wouldn’t believe them, or would tell them it was no big deal and to get over it. They tell me about so many horrible reactions to their incidents or feelings. Many of them never get any kind of help. They don’t get justice, they don’t get psychological help, they don’t even get assistance or sympathy from the people who are supposed to love them most. It’s not their fault. I know a lot of women who would love to go to a psychiatrist or psychologist, but they just can’t afford it. Insurance doesn’t even cover a tiny bit of what they need. I know a bunch who went to the police, and nothing was ever done.
So they keep their secrets to themselves. Who can blame them?
Still, that’s not even the point. The point is that while I know of all these women personally who have been assaulted, and millions more in the news, I don’t know of any men who have had their lives destroyed by false accusations. I have only even heard of a few cases of it in the world at large, a tiny percentage compared to the millions of cases of abuse that are real.
But before anyone comes forward with some story about how some woman once accused them of something they didn’t do, I will correct my statement about not knowing any man who was falsely accused. I know of one.
Once I was served with a PFA(Protection From Abuse order) from a girl I had been dating. The constable and his deputy showed up at my door and handed me the paperwork. I was shocked, to say the least. This was a women I had been dating on and off for years. There had never been one incident where I ever did anything to hurt or threaten her. I told the constable that, and he laughed. He and his deputy joked about how they were always handing out these things, and that women are emotional and get all upset over little things all the time. They told me how sorry they were that some dumb woman was causing me aggravation. I was a little taken aback by that, as this was law enforcement, there to protect women.
So I was stressed for a few days. I wasn’t sure what to do. Should I talk to a lawyer, should I show up at the hearing and defend myself? Should I just let her have the order against me, and hope it didn’t mess up anything in my life down the road? I couldn’t contact her, that was one of the stipulations of the order.
A little background at the time. Like I said, we had dated on and off for years. About six months prior to the order, when we got back together, she had been seeing someone else. In the six months we had been dating at this time, this guy was still in her life at times. He was actually abusive, which is why she broke up with him in the first place. She had told me a week before that she was seeing him again. I begged her not to go back to him, but she wouldn’t hear it. That was the sole thing she mentioned in the order, that I told her “You and I belong together, you don’t belong with him”. She said that she perceived that as a threat, and while I don’t see that statement as any kind of a threat, that’s the whole point of perception. People see things differently. I also had a penchant for punching holes in the wall on occasion. People used to laugh about it, and I always thought that it was a healthier outlet than actually punching people. Later I came to realize that it is still violent, and still a scary thing for a woman to witness, especially a woman who has been the victim of abuse.
What ended up happening was that she called me a few days later, and told me that she was sorry. She would drop it, and not show up at the hearing. She knew I would never hurt her, she was just afraid that I might say something or show up at her house, and get her in trouble with this guy she was seeing. She panicked, and saw this as a quick way to make sure I didn’t cause any trouble in her relationship. Ironically, I think mostly because he would have taken it out on her.
She had broken up with him again, and she ended up coming over the day of the hearing, just to prove that she wasn’t trying to trick me into not showing up. We actually had a great day, and ended up dating again for the next couple of years. I’m still good friends with her to this day.
So there you go, I was a victim of a false accusation. My life is fine. Granted, it could have gone the other way, but even if it had, how badly would it have affected my life?
I am middle class white guy. The company I was working for at the time just laughed when I told them about it, and expressed their sympathies. The cops who came and delivered the order were on my side, with none of the facts other than I seemed like a nice guy with my shit together. Don’t think a judge in the men’s club wouldn’t have seen it the same way. I have heard horror stories. My friends and family knew who I was, and they knew it wasn’t true.
Meanwhile, the women I know who have been abused are still having it affect their lives everyday. Every facet of their lives, in ,most cases. The way they look at the world has radically changed for them. It is frightening, it is chaotic, they have a hard time trusting anybody or anything, and why shouldn’t they? They were assaulted, they were abused, they had everything taken from them, and no one seemed to care. They were blamed, they were accused, they were ignored. Even now, years and decades later, their pain and trauma gets dismissed. By their friends and family. By their boyfriends or husbands. By law enforcement, by their leaders. Now they see victims of the same abuse mocked by no less than the President of the United States.
They see these same people supporting the abuser. How are they supposed to feel? What message does that send? I know so many women who can’t even be a part of this conversation because it triggers them, and reminds them of their own pain and horror that they endured.
So don’t be fooled for one minute about how poor, defenseless men are the ones who need to be protected. Any man who says that isn’t a man at all. Any real man I know wants to protect women, not fear them. And the men who are cowards, and probably guilty of a bunch of terrible shit themselves? They should fear women, because now women are finding their voice, and discovering how powerful they really are. Of course, all oppressors get scared when the people they have oppressed for so long finally rise up. The reckoning is coming, and I’m not afraid at all.
Are you?

Cynics Beware

I still see so many cynics and doomsayers ready to concede Kavanaugh's nomination. They still think that even with everything that's happened, that he'll still just get put on the Supreme Court.
Thing is, people were ready to give up weeks ago, then the Dems showed how he refused to answer any questions, and politicians and activists and regular people made a lot of noise about unsealing his records and obstruction of justice. Still, the cynics cried that it didn't matter.
Then there was an accusation of sexual assault, then another, and another. "They won't let her testify, the victim won't get a hearing, it won't make a difference!" the naysayers shouted again, throwing their hands up in the air.
Then, a courageous woman sat in front of a bunch of angry men and the nation, and quietly, with dignity, plead her case. The candidate and the men promoting him came off horribly. Kavanaugh perjured himself, and fell apart under pressure, and his outbursts severely damaged his credibility and his ability to serve on the SCOTUS.
"So what? There will be no delay or investigation, he will just be confirmed." the negative crowd responded.
Then two more courageous women cornered a spineless and wishy-washy Senator in an elevator, a Senator who just so happened to have decided not to run for reelection earlier that year. A Senator with nothing to lose. Lo and behold, that Senator did something noble and shocking, and actually stood up and forced an investigation that only moments before most people assumed would never happen.
Now those same naysayers are saying that the investigation will be a sham, and it is corrupted. That might have some truth to it, but I think that those people are underestimating the FBI and the Justice Department, as well as all the Senators and protesters and activists who got them this far to begin with. I think that they might be discounting human decency, and the power of the people.
And yeah, this time next week, Brett Kavanaugh might still be put on the Supreme Court.
But now he is tainted beyond repair. Now he has chinks in his armor that can be used to impeach him, to call any of his decisions into question, to actually undermine the legitimacy of the Supreme Court itself. He might become the only judge serving on the Supreme Court to be tried for rape. He is only going to inflict more damage on the GOP and their causes going forward. At this point, the GOP is shooting themselves in the foot by placing him there. They are thinking short term, while the Dems are playing the long game.
Don't get me wrong, I like the cynics. I am a cynic, at heart. You need the cynics to point out the absurdity, the injustice, and prepare us for the inevitable at times. I just think that we do ourselves an injustice to view this whole circus as a negative, when the positives are overwhelming.

Yet another sports analogy about politics...

One big thing in politics and sports is momentum. It's also a pretty big thing in physics. Right now, all the momentum is with the Democrats. Sure, the power is with the Republicans, and on paper it should have been an easy win, but anyone who has ever watched a 14 point underdog win a big football game against the defending champions in the second half, you know that things don't always work out the way you expect them to.
When momentum shifts, it throws off your whole gameplan. Suddenly it starts affecting the team in ways you never imagined, and didn't notice until it is too late to manage with simple tweaks to your strategy. Now your defense is getting tired, and the opposition is seeing all your plays and schemes, and is now familiar with them. Now your opponent knows how to counter them. Your offense has to throw out some of the more successful, low risk plays for more dangerous ones that could cover more ground, but wind up hurting you because of their recklessness.
That is the position the GOP is in now. They are reeling, giving up too much ground and being forced to take much more riskier moves. Not just in the Kavanaugh debacle. Everywhere.
In their attempt to control the narrative and plug the leaks and cover up the lies, they have opened their flanks to attack, and the attackers are relentless. They have exposed their weaknesses and shortcomings, and those weaknesses will be exploited. They are spread too thin.
They have managed to paint themselves as misogynists, hysterical whiners, bullies, and complicit in the obstruction of justice. Worst of all in Washington, they once again prove themselves incompetent.
They knew once Trump became president and didn't temper his arrogance and bizarre rants and hatred, that there would be a countdown timer until it all exploded like a cheap roadside fireworks stand. They probably never even expected to make it to the midterms, but they became emboldened by Trump's base, and their stubborn refusal to accept reality.
But now, even those rubes can't help them, so they are overreaching and trying everything they can, while they still have some control of the game. Meanwhile, behind closed doors, they are like crooked accountants, shredding paper while the FBI knocks on their door. They just want to get themselves as clean and protected as they can before they get out of Dodge.
It will be hard to turn that momentum. If the Democrats are smart, they will be inclusive, to the progressives and the socialists and the young people who want to stay on the offensive and move the ball forward. Moderates and progressives can coexist. There is a lot of common ground, but a lot of that gets lost in today's combative atmosphere.
There is another sports analogy, and that is you don't let the other team up when you have them down, you go for the kill. We are at a point in history where the racist, misogynist, crooked old white man club can finally be crippled, perhaps permanently. We need all parts of the left to do that. It is a golden opportunity, and we can't squander it with infighting and division in the ranks. You can't fight a world war and a civil war at the same time. You need full strength from all parts of the team, working towards a single goal.
That goal should be using our momentum to crush the opposition while they are down. It might sound cruel, but it is much more humane in the long run, for everyone.